Etiquette on Being Out and About (Conducting One’s Self in Public)

How important are manners or etiquette? Manners or knowledge and practice of etiquette is a reflection of one’s personality which is the exact portrait of one’s true character and attitude towards life. If you see good manners you see a good person.

Sometimes it’s not how one clothes, presents or grooms his or herself that sets him or her apart in a crowded place.  It may sound like an X factor but it surely has more to do on how one carries him or herself in public.  There is that inevitable something, which even if one is in flip flops and humble shorts, some individuals really do stand out. 

Specifically this has to do with the way of how they come across, how they carry themselves.  Such confidence, fluidity and finesse in actions, given off in that unmistakable aura, is almost always a product of either good upbringing or learned manners.

Emily Post, an American known for writing on etiquette, described these distinguishable people as possessing of cultivation and worldly knowledge whose perfect actions are not necessarily byproducts of being a member of the fellowship of the wealthy or of exalted birth.  These people are the gentle-folk whose good form in speech, charm of manner, knowledge of the social amenities coupled with the instinctive consideration for the feeling of others serve as their credentials by which society of whatever culture respects and recognizes them.

How important are manners or etiquette? Manners or knowledge and practice of etiquette is a reflection of one’s personality which is the exact portrait of one’s true character and attitude towards life.  If you see good manners you see a good person.

Manners extend to all facets of our lives.  Here is my second entry on Modern Etiquette.  This talks about how one should conduct one’s self in public – when we are out and about. 

Here are the well-mannered ways that used to be practiced and taught to every little boy and girl.  Sadly, modern life’s complexities do not afford every parent the time nor the presence of mind to still teach these so here I am doing my part in reminding myself and others that these etiquettes are still worth practicing.

a)      A man who is walking with two ladies – should always take the curb side of the pavement.  He shouldn’t sandwich himself between them.  The reason? Men should always protect the ladies in whatever way they can and thus he should take the curb side.

b)       A man walking with his beloved - should be careful that his actions don’t call attention to him or herself.  Showings of affection done blatantly coupled with loud talking always carries either a frown of response or a pity of understanding that the doer is uneducated in the proper manners.

c)      To call someone – One’s name shouldn’t be shouted in a crowded public place unless absolutely necessary.  Absolutely necessary means going beyond waving to attract that particular person’s attention but only for a very important reason. 

So much as one can detail the innumerable ways of the etiquette in conducting oneself in public, still, the fundamental rules apply:

1)      Do not attract attention to yourself. 

2)      Stay away from attention-getting-conduct.

3)      Keep clothes subtle.  Attention should be on you:  what you say, what you do and what you already achieved.  People’s attention shouldn’t be on what’s on you nor what you have. Unless otherwise it is necessary in one’s profession to attract such kind of attention.

4)      Speak in an appropriate tone of voice.

5)      Don’t stare.

6)      Don’t talk across anyone.

7)      Don’t expose your private thoughts or feelings unless otherwise asked to.  In this instance this should be done not to the point of discrediting anyone (unless it is also one’s profession to do so speaking the truth).

You get what you deserve.  Birds of the same feather flock together.  You are only as good as the one you end up spending your life with.  You are in this state that you had done to yourself.  If these clichés aren’t good enough to wake us up to the truth of how important manners (that others plainly and simply call etiquette) are then we should stop wondering why no one is treating us right and nothing good is happening in our lives.

Read more: http://socyberty.com/relationships/etiquette-on-being-out-and-about-conducting-ones-self-in-public/#ixzz1N3Ovc1Zj

Etiquette on Having and Being a Newbie – New Neighbor, Co-worker Even New Classmate

With the reality of busier and complicated lifestyles of anyone from different age and status it is but uncommon nowadays to pay heed wondering whether we are still behaving as much as we can ethically.

These days it is already considered polite to utter a mere “Hello” to any newbie: new neighbor, new colleague or even a new classmate.

Because of the evolution of humanity that gave birth to ever demanding, complicated and busier lifestyles the fact that there is and was another, though grander, but definitely more touching and noble way to acknowledge any newcomer is naturally forgotten.

People in the olden days and some people up to now who “can afford” to give dinners or dinner parties in their houses gave them not only to build their PR or connections. People in-the-know consider inviting anyone to such gatherings as a sign of good breeding. As there is always someone new somewhere, somehow dinner parties is a sure-fire way to take PR and goodbreeding and make them work as one.

Though things like dinner parties stem from the days when etiquette was an intricate part of one’s own home training and schooling inviting people to one’s party or merely to a meal or a snack in one’s own house or somewhere near is nowadays actually considered already a sign of manners: imparting a sense of welcome and basically showing good faith towards any newcomer’s arrival.

The senior or most prominent resident of the neighborhood, the senior or most prominent person in the workplace or even the most well-meaninged of a class of students still should take the initiative of welcoming the new arrival in however way that is accepted and is considered possible to do today.

The office worker can offer an invitation for a coffee, the most prominent member of the neighborhood can offer an invitation to a meal in his or her house and the student can say hello, invite the new arrival for a snack in the canteen or just plainly accompany him or her around the school as the newcomer still finds his or her way.

Any new arrival or newbie’s role is to always respond, whenever possible, with an affirmative to any invitation or greeting he or she gets.

In some instances when that new person who moves in the neighborhood is of the same prominence and/or age of the one that the neighborhood considers as their own it wouldn’t matter at all who would do the inviting. The one who is from the neighborhood can say, “I wish you would come to see me,” to which the ethically appropriate reply of the new arrival would be, “I will with pleasure.”

The other version of being ethical when the newcomer who is of the same age and/or prominence as the one the neighborhood has doing the inviting is, “I should like to come see you, if I may,” to which the answer of the resident person should ethically be, “I shall be delighted if you will.”

Etiquette usually has the hint of those days when life was simpler and was still beautifully less complicated. Much as no one can stop father time from improving and thereby complicating our lives good taste in manners should continually do the same: evolve with the times and remind us that life is still beautiful, though a little more complicated, than it used to be.

Read more: http://socyberty.com/work/etiquette-on-having-and-being-a-newbie-new-neighbor-co-worker-even-new-classmate/#ixzz1J0hqUywI